Absurd patent of the month: the multi-fonctional hammock

Le hamac multifonctionnel
Absurd patent of the month: n°US7735166
Publié le 3 July 2023

This month, we wanted to entertain you with a patent designed for summer vacation: a hammock assembly and associated method (patent n°US7735166).

Designed to offer comfort and pleasure to the user, this recent patent, filed by a certain Mr. Jack Weeks in 2010, describes the installation of a rather sophisticated hammock: two poles, a hammock, sleeves slidably positioned about the bottom ends of each poles… and at least one accessory and a mechanism for anchoring it to the poles. The assembly may further include a mechanism for enabling the rotation of the sleeves in order to assist the user in penetrating the poles into the ground surface.

The multi-fonctional hammock

This is all well and good, you may say, but isn’t it better to tie a hammock to a tree (or rather two, if you don’t want to fall)? It’s obvious, but not everyone has two trees at the right distance on hand (as everyone has already observed, trees are never positioned at the right distance, it’s Murphy’s Law, unless they have been planted on purpose by a very farsighted person).

The inventor easily recognizes that other patents on hammocks exist, but adds that they describe stakes that are difficult to install, inefficient, and above all much less comfortable than his invention. Indeed, the inventor has decided to create the Rolls-Royce of hammocks, easy to use and transport, and equipped with all the essential accessories for a Premium quality idleness: a television (so as not to miss a single episode of The Young and the Restless, even on vacation), a tray (special for cocktails), a canopy (you have to protect yourself from the sun) or even a fan (much pleasant in very hot weather). We guess that there was no room left on the poles for the ice cube dispenser and the popcorn machine. Frankly, we have never seen so many accessories on a tree!

The inventor does not explain how electrical devices are powered. Never mind, an extension cord to an electrical source will work pewell, or even a solar panel for nature lovers. And now, let’s go for real relaxation!

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